A Decade

 Ten years is a significant period of time. What do you have planned for your next ten? An equally important query can be, what have we learned from the last ten? Do I want to take these lessons and invest them in my future?

I have often said that: "The older I get the dumber I get!" Perhaps I should clarify that pronouncement. As times passes, the vast number of things that I do not know, becomes more and more clearly apparent leaving the intelligence that, I thought, I possessed in the dusty shadows.  

This last decade has been one of awakening for me.

"Little" things matter, and little things don't matter. 

The small irritations of life and relationships, the little things, can be like water and the rock. They can wear us down, completely changing our attitude, disposition and behavior. These are not the things to base a life on; the nit-picky, whiny, woe-is-me, waah, waah, waah, impatient nonsense. I think it's best to just let them go. Save all of that energy for something much better, the other "Little" things. 

Kind words, hugs, patience, humility, empathy, sincerity, encouragement, appreciation, attention, generosity, a gentle touch, a small act or gift, or just listening, no talking, just really listening, when someone needs a nonjudgemental ear. In a word Love.

So, where could we begin to practice these critically important "Little" things?

At home! With the ones we cherish. It is sad that we, often times, are the most harsh and unforgiving with the very ones that we are closest to. Yes, I'd begin there. 

But for some of us that time has passed. Loss is an incredibly powerful and impartial teacher. Loss can be an illuminator, showing us where we have done well and where we have not. I could have done so much better.

But what if we were alerted to these "Little" things, while there was still time? This my attempt at that. To share, to alert about what I have learned from my loss. It was ten years ago this morning that my window of opportunity closed. After 35 years of having this amazing woman by my side, she was gone.

I have to pause here to say, this is not meant to be a sad post. It is simply a nudge to express your gratitude and love more freely, more often. To just become better at living and caring for others.

Deb and I had such wonder-filled times together and a beautiful family. I am forever grateful to her! I will love her as long as I am alive.

My wish today is that this reminder will stir you to focus on the "Little" things in your life. Start at home and work your way out. Can you imagine what a difference can be made if more of us tried doing this? 

Are you up for the challenge? I hope that you are. It is a worthy and rewarding effort. 

Let's go do it!

"Discipline weighs ounces, Regret weighs tons."  ~ Jim Rohn 

Goodbye is not forever, no, it is not the end.

It simply means " I'll miss you" until we meet again. 

 ~ Unknown

Sticks and Stones

When I was a kid there was this old saying:

“Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.”

I'm sure who ever came up with that little gem meant well. And as far as “bone breaking” it has merit. But, (seems like there is always a but) when observed under a brighter illumination we find some contradiction.

As a child, I struggled with this notion. My personal experience was not supporting this colloquialism. When I was the recipient of unkind or “hurtful” words, it did hurt. It was painful, emotionally and physically. My stomach would ache, my pulse would gallop making my breathing ragged. A deep hollow would overtake my insides. All quite uncomfortable and extremely unpleasant sensations. I got the idea of the “well meaning” author…but I wasn’t buying it.

The vast majority of humans want to be liked, even loved. So my reasoning was that this consensus would have similar feelings when they were assaulted with vicious verbiage.

Scientific and medical studies now prove how detrimental stress, anger and hostility can be to us physically and psychologically. Hate-filled expressions can inhabit our memories for a lifetime. Our words may not break bones, however they can break hearts and destroy spirits.

Words are powerful! They can also move our emotions to action in a benevolent purpose, cause laughter to erupt spontaneously, or tears to flow. If words can be that compelling, that persuasive and influential, shouldn’t we craft them in the most beneficial, constructive and helpful way?

What feelings and emotions saturate your soul when you are sincerely complimented or appreciated? Doesn’t your heart feel warm and joy-filled? What about satisfaction, delight and confidence?

Yes, words are exceptionally powerful!!

“Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words?

Words are so powerful, so versatile that they are capable of hurting or healing, destroying or building up. Please articulate positivity and hope with those you meet. It is good for all of us.

You are the author. Craft your words carefully, with hope, and love.

Moments 3

 A squirrel rustles through dead leaves in search of a snack. A variety of birds sing, chirp and tweet, sharing their individual joy. Woodpeckers hammer their heads against huge trees. The lowing of nearby cattle adds depth. The distant warning of a locomotives horn is barely heard. An aircraft adds it presence as it fades into the horizon. The neighbors dogs just joined in as a gentleman, out for a stroll, put them on high alert.

Moments. So many sounds and happenings in each moment. But we have to be aware. We miss so much.

This moment, recorded here, is just what I have captured while having a cup of coffee on my porch this morning.

So easy to miss. Such a delightful experience for me.

It is a fast paced world today. Semi-organized chaos. What if we made it a choice to pause for brief respites? To take a deep breath. To calm our minds, to listen, to smell, to feel and absorb what is happening in that exact moment.

 So many treasures are free for our rich enjoyment. Our senses are a truly amazing gifts.

 These treasures envelope each of us at almost any time. But genuinely enjoyed, only if we take a moment. 

Moments: 2

Recently, I was taken back to a feeling that I had not experienced in decades. It was brief. But there it was. 

 "So, what are you young fellows out doing today? Enjoying this beautiful weather?" ( I almost missed this by not engaging...)

 I was waiting for a carry out pizza. I assumed their appearance signified they were doing the same. 

 "Yes!" was their answer. Then, with a big smile, one of them added: "It's spring break!!"

 "Wow!" I replied. "Even better!!" 

 And there it was, that feeling!! Sleeping in, no commitments, no requirements, no responsibilities, no homework, no arithmetic, no "have toos!!" Complete and total freedom. Dashing from the elementary school door out into the warm, sunny, spring air and 3 months of glorious freedom!!! 

 Can you relive this feeling?? Do you remember? Are you grasping the experience and exhilaration? How long has it been for you? 

 What if I had not chosen to greet these young men? Think of missing out on this exquisitely peaceful, joyfilled, and excitedly relaxing moment. 

  I hope you will think of this "Ramble" the next time a similar opportunity reveals itself to you. Will you seize the moment? It's simple to do. 

  I wish for you the exuberance of a 3rd grader, bounding into the  freedom and joy of summer vacation!! 

Yahoooo!!!🌞

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Thank you, again, for sharing your time with us.